Two years ago today my life changed completely. I would like to think for the better, although some days saying that's actually true can be really hard. After losing 30 pounds, within only a couple months after having my daughter, and being back and forth between the doctors office and ER, I finally had a diagnosis. Having something concrete was a comforting relief. Just knowing that I wasn't crazy, it wasn't all in my head, and that I had a way of fixing myself. I was incredibly grateful to whomever it was that told my mother-in-law (and my mother-in-law for making them order the test) about Celiac Disease. But the days to come would prove to be incredibly hard and some days still are.
It is a disease that you really do suffer in silence. Fatigue, weakness, nausea, brain fog, feeling emotionally drained, headaches, vomiting, and bloating were just some of the symptoms I had along with the gut-wrenching stomach pains. Even when getting cross-contaminated from eating out, one crumb can cause these symptoms to come back for days or even weeks at a time. It's a lot of pretending you're fine on the outside when you feel like you are dying on the inside. I refuse to miss out on life from this disease so I put on my face and keep moving forward.
Some people have no symptoms of this disease at all and are unfortunately left untreated, later developing other diseases or even cancers. If everyone was just a little more informed, we could stop so many people from getting sick!!
The ignorance of so many people on movies and television can hit me right in the heart. Making jokes or making fun of people who are "gluten-free"... I will never understand why people feel the need to bully people. Have some compassion people! This is not a made-up disease! And the "well, what can you eat?" statement is just ridiculous. I can make anything gluten-free with a little effort and it will taste better than your gluteny boxed garbage. It's just sad that people know so little about the foods they are putting into their bodies and the effects they can have. I really wish testing for Celiac Disease was done more often but from my experience with the doctors at my hospital, they are also ignorant to this disease. I had 5 different doctors tell me they didn't want to test me for it because "that's not what it is"... seriously.
I no longer have the ease of driving through a fast-food restaurant to pick up a meal, or stopping for a frozen pizza, or even having samples of food at the grocery store. I think your entire thought process has to change in order to embrace this disease, if that's ever really possible. I had to get rid of half of the food in my kitchen and even some of the appliances and cookware I used. I had to chuck some of my makeup, lipsticks, hair products, lotions, etc. Gluten is everywhere, not just food items. Events and outings can be very difficult as a Celiac. Going out to eat sucks (besides Twigs Restaurant) because of fear of cross-contamination or someone not knowing what they're doing. I'm still finding it the most difficult to go to the fair and smell the cheese-curds that I can no longer have. (If you want to tears well up behind my eyes, eat a cheese-curd in front of me.)
The next hardest thing as a Celiac, would be trying to attend family functions or weddings and having to bring an entire meal to lug around with me. It seems to be easier than trying to explain cross-contamination issues or feel guilty for having people "cater" to my disease. That is one thing I will always tire from, is feeling so dang guilty over having this disease. Essentially, this is not my fault, I know...but having so few people really understand the disease is what makes it so difficult. I, thankfully, have some wonderful people in my life that have truly embraced me having this disease, who have really tried to learn what it is and what I need. (Thank you everyone who has done this for me! You know who you all are! xoxo). It really helps to have a support group to not feel so alone in this!
I will forever be grateful for this disease. It's true! I now am so much more knowledgeable of the foods I am feeding my family. I have also become a killer cook! Cooking is now my favorite hobby! I have finally found something that I have a talent for, something I was meant to do. I love the challenge of cooking now! I love figuring out how to make something gluten-free! I love starting something from scratch and really putting your soul into the foods you are making. I also love knowing exactly what I am eating since I now have to read labels.
So today I have successfully accomplished being gluten-free for two years and here's to...well, the rest of my gluten free life!
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